i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
