Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
