I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
