Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
