I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
