For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize