as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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