Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
