dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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