And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
