I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
