We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
