thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Your cock deserves a montage
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
