i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
