She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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