actually, I'm a sock model
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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