fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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