when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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