Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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