and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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