did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
