I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
you made out with another girl for some wings
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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