Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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