just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
