Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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