Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
