just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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