I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
