Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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