dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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