so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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