we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
