So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
false alarm, still single
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
