I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
