what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
