I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
