I'm jealous of your bromance
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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