You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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