We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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