I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
