i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
