good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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