I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
