wrigley field is MILF paradise
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
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