he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize