Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
