Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
