I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
