Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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