Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
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